This is my original article on
Reality TV which started life as a chapter in the first political book I was
writing. The article I wrote this year (2016) for The
Powerlessness of Now drew on the remaining notes and cuttings in the binder.
They ought really to have been slotted into this earlier work. However, the two
versions have a different emphasis. This one is more political whereas the one
I wrote recently encompasses the phenomenon of Reality TV in general. I should
point out that I have lopped the end off to add to another book, mind!
"Are you
watching Big Brother?" someone
asked me on the telephone last night. I replied, “No, actually, I was just
about to watch The Hitch Hikers Guide to
the Galaxy, but I don’t have to.’ Hopeful of some reassurance, I then
added, “You’re joking aren’t you?’ The woman on the other end of the phone fell
silent. She might as well have asked if I had stopped breathing. Not that I
wish to pick on women, but Reality TV, as opposed to sports, does appear to get
them hooked on the drug of television. A couple of home truths: “Women need to
feel like there are people worse off than they are. That’s why soap operas and
Oprah Winfrey-type shows are successful.” (Risqué
Jokes, Ravette Publishing, Sussex, UK, 2004, p.55). And, “Women don’t
understand the appeal of sports. Men seek entertainment that allows them to
escape reality. Women seek entertainment that reminds them of how horrible
things could be.” (ibid, p.56).
Chantelle and Preston
Chantelle and Preston are an “ordinary’ girl and boy and are both warm, friendly, caring, sensitive individuals who know themselves sufficiently and are true to themselves even at a young age. There are examples of the kinds of people we should want to represent society and to whom we should want children to aspire to be like. When people say “that could be me,’ they should realise that it is already them. It is not about an opportunity for fame and fortune. It is about the inner qualities. The outer glamour is just a topping. They are still the same people. One would rather be happy, civilised, humorous, down-to-earth, sweet, strong, sensible, open and adventurous than a “traditional’ celebrity who is something special for more external reasons. Is this the beginning of the end of the cult of celebrity?
For all his intelligence, Mr. Galloway proved himself to be a menacing,
self-important, vengeful bully using his power only to support those who
promise to further his own personal interests. In his ambition for power, he
seemed to think himself invincible in the face of the aggression and cruelty
enjoyed by his own country-men and women ensured by the orders of Big Brother. No different from the world
of British politics, one could argue. That seriousness and aggressive game plan
to side with certain housemates and wage war against those by whom he felt
threatened, however, could not, surely, win his Respect Party more votes. I
found it reassuring to watch him take on the US Senate. He has such a rigid
will and identity, however, and appears to be a narrow-minded patriarch with a
high opinion of himself and an obsession with power.
George Galloway
Galloway then complained that certain housemates had taken away his rights.
People were breaking the rules, it seems, but George was the one who was
punished. That is how it goes with rules; someone gets caught because they do
something different or at the wrong time. Big
Brother asked the housemates to decide on a punishment and they stopped him
nominating so he could not vote against them. That put paid to his “shifty’
scheme. It was probably worth it just to see his reaction. He said that he
would get them back “either in here or outside.” Preston admired him at the
beginning, it seems, but then said he was running a socialist dictatorship.
Chantelle “branded Galloway “a wicked, wicked, wicked man’ and Preston said: “He’s
about as democratic as a Nazi.’” (Metro,
25 January 2006, p.21). Quite shamelessly, he projected his own negative
qualities onto Preston and said that the world would see them. It did not take
people much to see through the man who became one of Scotland’s youngest MPs at
32, but who was “expelled from Labour in 2003 after calling the Government “Tony
Blair’s lie machine.’” (Metro, 6
January 2006, p.3). Ironically, Galloway said he was trying to show that there
is nothing extreme about him and that impressing even half of the viewers,
especially young people, would be a big gain for him politically.
Unfortunately, he appears to have alienated young people.
Metro also included a bio of Robert
Burns in the previous day’s edition: “An Ayreshire-born, rural, working-class,
anti-establishment liberal socialist with an eye for the ladies. Think George
Galloway meets Irvine Welsh but with principles and talent.” (Metro, 24 January 2006, p.33). Residents
in his constituent of Tower Hamlets complained that their MP was in the Big Brother house publicising Respect
instead of representing them in the House. I doubt if a stint in panto season
did any harm. Whatever you think of George Galloway,” writes a Metro reader, “at least everyone knows
who he is now.” (Metro, 30 January
2006, p.18). It is slightly reminiscent of the programme filmed a few years ago
featuring Michael Portillo’s brief period of attempting to help raise problem
kids or something. One certainly cannot fault the man’s courage. He confessed
afterwards that he was not prepared for living in a house 24 hours a day with
people with whom he had nothing in common. He realises now that it is
impossible to live in harmony in that house and that Big Brother goes out of its way to cause conflict for the sake of
entertainment. It is “boring and turgid,” he said. You are with the same people
with whom you have nothing in common and cut off from people you love. “Big Brother drips things in to create
confrontation,” he said. It is foolhardy action on anyone’s part to participate
in such a game show or, as fellow ejected contestant Faria Alam described it: “a
sort of think show that exploits people’s frailties.” (Jonathan Dimbleby, 22 January 2006, ITV1). She said it is a kind of
pantomime. When people are evicted, they are cheered or booed by the crowd.
Burns and Galloway in 2006
I have found a little note that I wrote earlier in 2005 (before I had really
ever watched any “Reality TV’ or even knew what the term really implied): “Exactly
what sort of men watch these programmes? I don’t know any. Who are they? What
do they look like? Seriously, I’m curious. Are they gay? That would be
understandable since they are sensitive and often enjoy a good emotional drama
and a bit of gossip as many women do. It’s preferable to beating people up, I
suppose.’ The good thing about including comments like these in retrospect is
that you no longer have to own them. Right? (Well, we all change and grow). As
judgemental as this might be, I find the idea that millions of people are
watching “uninterrupted drivel’ on their “telescreens’ troubling, if not
distantly terrifying. This is how people are distracting themselves from
noticing that “Big Brother’ is watching them and that they are enslaved to Him
via the media. It is another form of “brainwipe,’ an instant fix for those
emotions that like to cling to people and bitch, gossip, criticise, praise,
blame, condemn...pouring along the gutter - or “brainpipe’ - of human
consciousness.
No wonder Madonna has reportedly banned her kids from watching TV. She claims
that her decision was “’punk rock’ rather than old-fashioned.” (Metro, 1 November 2005, p.12). George
Orwell did more than ensure that “Davina McCall would have something to do on a
Saturday night.” (“The Story of Sci-Fi,’ a supplement in Empire, Issue 195, September 2005, p.11). His hopes for the working
classes, the precious “proles,’ was no that they be spared the brainwashing. In
fact, however, many cannot get enough of Reality TV shows like Big Brother. It is the “soylent green’
of the mind, gobbled up hungrily to fill the void left by the lack of education
and encouragement to reach their full potential. If only they knew what they
were consuming and could see that a totalitarian regime has not been necessary
to enable an external source of power to control and manipulate people’s minds
and stop them from living and expressing themselves as individuals.
The Establishment is now well-established, like a mature tree. The System is
capable of looking after itself now. Everybody is plugged into it and the
machines live at our expense. We all go through the motions while our only
purpose, without us knowing it, is to feed the Machine World. We are cabbages
in the field and we need a new saviour, a human being who can wake us up and
save us from such a worthless, banal existence. The Jerry Springer Show certainly gave the genre a shake. One might
be forgiven for referring back to the Two Minutes Hate in Orwell’s novel.
People would have to assemble at a regular, specified time and hurl as much
negative abuse at the image of Immanuel Goldstein shown on the screen.
Soylent Green Quad
Movie Poster
“People are watching that Reality TV,” observes Billy Connolly on stage in Dublin. “People are sitting in their house watching people sitting in a house! What is that? “Oh, I don’t like him, he should be voted...Fuck! The IQ level is plummeting.” (Billy Connolly Live 2002). 39 per cent of people under 24 did not vote in the last election. They are more interested in Big Brother and are prepared to vote for people to be evicted from the house or win the show. Perhaps this is the only way to get them to vote either for or against a politician. At least, it is a start. [In fact, this was the start of my political education which led eventually to realising that ‘whoever you vote for, the government gets in.’ Consequently, I no longer advocate voting for corporate entities such as political parties]. It is the custard that is used to make the meat more appetising. I am sure most people, unlike me, love the stuff!
David Cameron has used the same tactic by promoting his “positive message’ about green issues, taking the focus off the blue’s prevailing theme of “atishoo, atishoo, we all fall down.’ Okay, so it is all bullshit but, by concentrating on this and not talking much about other issues, he has managed to win round many traditional Tory supporters. One might go as far as saying that they have actually started to think for themselves for a change but are now reacting to the more negative news in the press. It is pathetic, really. The way to get power now is to be a celebrity. The latest issue of OK! has arrived, the telescreen tells me: “First for celebrity news.’ I found a copy of this magazine on a tube train one day and I simply could not believe my eyes. It is the saddest fucking magazine I’ve ever seen. It’s Not OK! One would not be surprised to find a full-blown picture of David Cameron on the front cover. That is how low politics have stooped now. No sooner did I speak than, the very next day, Jonathan Dimbleby displays a copy of the latest GQ magazine. On the cover is none other than Mr. Cameron looking “sultry,’ projecting a more masculine facial expression as if he is Marlon Brando. You couldn’t make it up! Galloway and Cameron are just trying to engage the public. Bless their cotton socks.
Sam Preston with his pet chihuahua
Is it not somewhat eerie, even “terrifying, that more people associate the term “Big Brother’ with a TV show than George Orwell’s novel just as his story is starting to come true?” asked Peter Hitchens (The Mail on Sunday) on Jonathan Dimbleby (22 January 2006, ITV1). Orwell’s point, says Adam Smith, is that his dystopian vision might have happened already: “The fact is, the inhabitants of Oceania are unaware of their predicament - as in the pessimistic ending, is Winston Smith (“He had won the victory over himself. He loved Big Brother’)...1984 posits a world where a state lottery with infinitesimal chances of winning and ghastly, violent, entertainment pacifies the proles; where the state works towards 24-hour surveillance of every individual; and where a constant state of war is maintained and imaginary enemies and spies convince the public of the need for their liberty to be curtailed (“WAR IS PEACE’). Remind you of anywhere?” (ibid, p.11).
The System preys upon people’s weaknesses. Even those who question it and attempt to free themselves from indoctrination are at the mercy of the authorities because they fail to discover any power within themselves to permanently erase their insecurities. The pressures from without prevent the door from being opened fully. One might know that there is something on the other side, but dependency on the Machine allows it to slam the door shut in your face, suppressing even the urge to question authority. Resistance is futile. No one is permitted to be themselves or to believe that they are anyone other than who they think they are, or who they ought to be.
Celebrity Chef Nigella Lawson whose ex-husband Charles Saatchi choked her
outside Scott's restaurant over, apparently over having grandchildren, in 2013
In an interview with Heather Nicholson (The Times, 7 June 2005), comedienne Jo Brain, I mean Jo Brand, tells us: “My one piece of advice is to try not to be cruel to people. All this Reality TV aimed at humiliating people is not the road we should be going down. I must admit, though, that I am fascinated by it.” As the actor Val Kilmer opined on Nigella one afternoon, many people participating in Reality TV shows are “obsessed with revealing their sickest secret.’ Apparently, prior to her daily magazine series “that could otherwise have been made in the Fifties (right down to her frock),” Nigella Lawson protested: “’I don’t want to plunge deep into television’s rivers of banality,’” to which Lewis-Smith adds, “yet the host can get away with a good deal of inanity because (as Brand observed enviously) “everything you do oozes sex.’” (Evening standard, 26 July 2005, p.25). Jo Brand, Nigella’s chief guest on the previous day’s show, he says, is “the woman largely responsible for the development of wide-screen television.” (ibid, p.25). He wondered “why ITV had decided to commission what is essentially a remake of the long-defunct southern TV’s upper-middle-class House Party,” but also refers to the series as “competent lightweight early-afternoon fare.” (ibid, p.25).
If politicians themselves fail to charm and impress us, their privileged daughters, with the exception of Carol Thatcher, can certainly put something back into society, even it is just putting a smile on a TV critic’s face as a woman who is “quite simply sex on a stick” talks “in tones that make the Queen sound like a slut.” (ibid, p.25). He goes on: “My suspicion is that she’s simply such a great figure of lust for middle-aged male ITV executives that they decided to book her anyways, and to hell with the consequences...But, what’s harder to understand is why she is prepared to slum it in a daytime slot, where the viewing figures are only a fraction of what she’s used to at prime-time. After all, her hubby isn’t short of a few hundred million, so maybe Charles Saatchi is imply doing the traditional Jewish thing and sending his wife out to work.” (ibid, p.25). One imagines that trying her hand at being a chat show host is a suitable hobby for “posh totty’ whose father ran the economy in the Eighties. Lewis-Smith recalls remarking to Nigel Lawson that, “Like Cilla, Oprah and Esther, she is one of those women who are instantly recognised by their first name alone...’You’ve named your daughter Nigella,’ I pointed out, “and perhaps Salman Rushdie could do something similar. Only his daughter would have to be called ‘Salmonella.’ And do you know what? The former Chancellor never even cracked a smile.” (ibid, p.25).
Creepy George Galloway and Polish Princess Rula Lenska cavorting on Celebrity Big Brother
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